Holiday Hiatus

I thought I should officially announce my holiday hiatus and find a way to incorporate a picture of a puppy. So there, I'm officially taking a break. Also, here's a puppy.

At the risk of sounding like a girl...

This is going to be quite rushed since I'm at work and I'm technically supposed to be doing stuff, like work. Here's the thing though: the office Christmas party is tonight. There's lots of food and cookies and treats all around. No one is focused. All of the people in charge are out to a long lunch. So why am I being asked to focus and be productive? I'm not quite sure but I know I'm failing at it. Since tonight is the Christmas Movie Marathon with my lovelies, I will not be near a computer until sometime tomorrow so this HBOTW needed to be written NOW.

Sometime last week, I was perusing ECHL rosters and I honestly can't even remember why. I think I was trying to look something up about the Elmira Jackals. Regardless, I came across a goalie named Jordan Parise. Yes, Zach Parise's brother. I assumed younger brother since Zach is in the NHL and Jordan is, well, not. I thought to myself, "Both of these brothers are kinda adorable," so they have been selected as this week's HBOTW! I present to you Zach and Jordan Parise!

So Zach is on the left and he's pretty adorable. He plays for the New Jersey Devils. He plays left wing. Born in 1984. Oh, very importantly, before SB has to go look it up, they are Americans. From Minnesota, in fact. So Jordan is on the right. He is currently playing for the Wheeling Nailers in the ECHL (one of my LEAST favorite ECHL teams. Who am I kidding? I don't like any of them other than the Walleye). He's a goalie. Born in 1982. Again, American-born.

European jerseys are so silly looking.

I suppose because I found this picture on some European website and I could not read the language (it wasn't French or basic Italian so I was lost), I can't be 100% sure if this is even a picture of Jordan Parise. But isn't it a nice picture? I like the angle and the lights.

I love this picture.

I think there's something fitting about the fact that he plays for NJ. You see, sometimes when I see his hair, I'm reminded of something like this. Seriously, check this out because it cracked me up. Zach is a little bit pale for the whole Jersey Shore look but that's why God invented tanning beds, right?

Ummm, so next Thursday is Christmas Eve and I won't be around a computer at all. I'll be driving to Dayton for dinner with some of the fam so I suppose HBOTW is officially on holiday break... unless I get inspired and come up with some great idea but what are the chances of that, right? Any ideas? Suggestions?

The Kids Aren't Alright

Last night was probably the best Walleye game yet this season. I'm having trouble posting the video on here so just go here and watch it instead. They set a new record by scoring 5 goals in one period. Sebastien Piche scored his first professional goal. The Walleye were down 1-0 going into the 3rd and just absolutely tore it up for the last 20 minutes. There were 90 minutes of penalties in the 3rd period, for a game total of 100 minutes. Fights, misconducts, goals - there's really nothing else I could have asked for. So what made last night's game different from all the other games for me?

I felt really uncomfortable just searching for an image of some random baby. Probably because babies make me uncomfortable to begin with, hence, I'm complaining about them now.

We were sitting next to a goddamn baby. I have always said that I don't really like kids. I want to have some someday but right now, I don't really like other people's kids and the only ones that I will like are my own unborn children. You will note in the above picture, I am not at a hockey game. I am simply sitting on a brick wall wearing a cowboy hat outside of the Fort Worth Stockyards. It was 1985 so there was DEFINITELY not any hockey within several hundred miles of me. Here is a list of things that I am definitely not doing in the above picture:

1- I am not kicking anyone's beer: The baby from last night was too young to be in her own seat, therefore, she was sitting on her mom's lap. This baby continually put her foot inside SB's beer cup. The mom did apologize so she does get credit there but if you're going to apologize and show that you're aware of the situation, perhaps you should stop it from happening several more times, n'est-ce pas?

2- I am not asking others around me to help me hold on to my possessions: The baby from last night dropped its pacifier on the dirty, nasty, beer-stained floor within 2 minutes of sitting down. It not only fell on the ground but actually fell and bounced under the row in front of us. The Walleye then scored a goal (that was later disallowed) but we missed all of that during the Nook-Gate scandal that was brewing in section 119. No less than 8 people were concerned in the matter of returning the pacifier to this child.

3- I am not dropping my pacifier on the dirty ground and then putting it back in my mouth to gross out everyone within a 10 foot radius: Now, I was absorbed into the game so I saw that the pacifier fell but then I was right back to the on-ice action. A few minutes later, during a commercial time out, I notice that the baby has the damn thing back in its mouth. Really? Am I crazy in thinking that's totally disgusting? These things do exist, ya know.

4- I am not crushing up cheese crackers and leaving them EVERY-EFFING-WHERE: SB and I went to get beer during the first intermission. When we came back to our seats, Schmegan warned us to look out for cheese crackers. This was an understatement. Seriously, this kid went cheese cracker crazy. The mom had allowed it to stand and eat cheese crackers in front of my and SB's seats while we were gone. The child clearly did not understand that it was supposed to consume the crackers and not throw them on the ground and step on them until creating an orange layer of dust on the floor. Or perhaps the baby was a genius and was trying to protect her pacifier from hitting the dirty ground the next time she dropped it out of the mouth and threw it on the ground. Either way, it was crunchy the rest of the game and the bottom of my purse is still a little bit orange. Just sayin.

5- I am not preventing anyone from yelling: I was afraid to yell because I didn't want to frighten the baby. See, I'm not all terrible and callous. I was trying to be very accomodating and I didn't even make any smartass remarks. But the third period was insane but I didn't want to cheer too loudly or yell at Jean-Francois David for having a stupid name for fear that the baby would be startled and start crying, which brings me to my next point...

Last night's baby did have one thing going for it: it did not cry. Or rather, I drank enough beer to not notice if the baby cried. Just the whole thing made us feel very awkward and uncomfortable and I hate that. So maybe this whole rant isn't about the baby. Maybe it's about parents who make others uncomfortable with their children. If you want to bring your kid to a game, then just be aware of others around you. Perhaps don't put the lady with the baby on the end of your group of people so that others who don't know you and don't care about your baby have to put up with their needs. Just a suggestion.

Tonight's game is against the Elmira Jackals again so I'm expecting it to be a good one. Also, it's a Sunday night game so there will definitely be less people and, therefore, less of a chance of me sitting by a baby. Right now I'm off to the Anthony Wayne vs. Central Catholic game at the Ice House and then downtown for the Walleye game. Ugh, I'm probably going to hell for bitching about babies. I just needed to vent. Yes, I made an Offspring reference earlier and I'm greatly amused by this.

I'm justifying this whole thing with the fact that writing this and thinking about this was Schmegan's idea and she's a pre-school teacher. If she is losing patience with a child, you know there's something wrong with the situation. So am I a complete jerkface?

At the risk of sounding like a girl...

Here's the scene: It was 6 p.m. I was just home from work and still couldn't think of anyone for HBOTW today. I asked my mom, who has never seen this site mind you, to name a hot hockey player. Her first answer? "Well, Hank. Duh." I told her I'd already done that. I also told her that I try not to be too Red Wings-centric, as hard as that is sometimes. Her second answer? "Vinny Lecavalier. Tampa Bay Lightning." WHAT? Where did that come from, mama? I just laughed and told her that maybe she should name a top 3 of hockey players and I would figure it out. Before she could do this, I yelled, "LUKE SCHENN! NEVERMIND!" and walked upstairs. Inspiration struck. He's having a good week. There's a Leafs game tonight and I'm wearing a Leafs tshirt right now (granted, it's a Kessel and not a Schenn but still). It just seems appropriate. I give you, Luke Schenn.

Perhaps you're not convinced. Maybe this will help.

Yeah, that's what I thought. And actually, I think I've pinpointed exactly what I like about him too. See, recently I've become very aware of what types of guys I'm attracted too, most likely because I write about hot boys once or twice a week. Luke Schenn does not fit this profile at all. He is neither scruffy nor does he have a fauxhawk. (Seriously, what is wrong with me?) The thing that he has going for him is his similarity to my teenage crush, Eric von Detten. Come on, you know you watched Brink and you enjoyed it too because it was a quality Disney original movie.

Seriously, so adorable. And Brink is a good movie. Shut up.

So he definitely started off the season slowly but recently, I've been much happier with him. I also enjoy when he does things like this.

He looks disheveled and I like that.



He looks nervous and I don't like that. But he does look good in blue.



He looks most comfortable when being interviewed. I need to find a way and reason to interview him.



So now, with all of the information, take another look at this. Feeling a little bit different about him yet?

It's like he's staring into your soul. Heh.

For more Luke Schenn loveliness, check out Wrap Around Curl. Actually, you should probably just check it out anyways because it's high quality over there.

At the risk of sounding like a girl...

This week has been a blur with work and everything. Literally, I didn't even pay attention to hockey this past week. That's how you know I've been stressed and busy because that never happens. Okay, I didn't totally ignore hockey. I only watched maybe 5 games this week and I only attended 1 though. That's a really low number for this point in the season so it's been a light week for me and I feel a little lost because of it.

Because of this, I've had a hell of a time thinking of who should be HBOTW. I've had several ideas of the past few days but tonight, inspiration struck. Brendan Shanahan!

He looks so happy! And he has awesome freaking teeth, just like Brock Wilson.

When I first starting watching hockey, my first favorite player was Brendan Shanahan. I had a Shanny poster above my bed when I was younger. (I believe that poster is in my basement right now. Yep, I still have it. It's a little faded and a little torn up. It's been with me in my old house, my new house, my college dorm, everywhere.)

It makes me really happy that you can still buy this online. And it makes me realize that my poster is basically 13 years old. And it really weirds me out that I'm old enough to have things that I clearly remember buying that are 13 years old. That was more than half my life ago. I have owned my Brendan Shanahan poster for more than half of the time that I've been alive. Whoa.

I don't know why I immediately loved him, aside from the rugged good looks and hilarious interviews. Heh.

I was reminded of this interview by my good friend Kyle Rossi who has his own blog. Read it.

I just love this guy. I don't have a lot to say about that. I just do.

Awwwww, just a young Canadian boy.


Scoring goals, being awesome...


Winning Cups...

Dressing up, looking hot...


::drool::

Shanny announced his retirement a few weeks ago and I might have cried a little. I still held out hope that he would find somewhere to play for this season since he left New Jersey in such a strange way at the beginning of the season. So, I wasn't surprised whatsoever when it was announced a few days ago that Shanny will be the VP of Hockey and Development for the NHL and I'm very happy for him. Maybe it means we'll see more of him walking around in suits. Yum.

You didn't think I would pass up a chance to show a picture of a Whalers jersey, did you?


I will also take any opportunity to show this too. The leap at 1:46 always makes me happy.

Sooooooooo I am completely open to suggestions for the upcoming week's HBOTW. I have a habit of only searching my memory for hot guys that have played for teams that I enjoy watching. Therefore, I never really think about people that play for the Ducks or the Habs or the Southeast division... so yes, requests. They don't even have to be Canadian :)

At the risk of sounding like a workaholic...

HBOTW is postponed until the weekend or at least until I finish up this work project thing. My deadline is 5 p.m. pacific time on December 3rd. I'm in the middle of a 13 hour work day right now. Writing anything is simply not going to happen yet.

In the meantime, enjoy this picture. I know I do because it combines two of my favorite things: Pandas and Shaq. There's nothing better.

What I'm Thankful For...

So I started writing this on Thanksgiving but life kinda got in the way and I'm just now finishing it. Pretend Thanksgiving hasn't happened yet. Or pretend that you're just late reading this and that I actually put it up days ago. There, that works.

So what I'm thankful for this Thanksgiving is... consistently inconsistent reffing. Yep, I love that NHL refs sometimes blow calls so ridiculously that you can't help but wonder what the hell they were thinking.

I don't love it because it makes the league look like a joke sometimes. I don't love it because I've spent thousands of dollars supporting the league through tickets and jerseys and playoff tickets and tshirts and my late night shop.nhl.com addiction only to have it thrown back in my face at important moments. I love it because it's something unifying for all hockey fans. I love it because it's not perfect. I love it because it actually is exactly what disproves the tin-foil hat conspiracy theorists because it happens to EVERY SINGLE TEAM. (And I'm a Wings fan and I can say that. There's no conspiracy. We've just been spoiled for years and years and years.) (Actually, that gives me an idea... something for later... hold that thought until next week...)

There are few words that make my hairs stand on end like the words 'intent to blow'. Wow, that sounded dirtier than I meant it. But seriously, every time I hear that phrase, I know that something is about to go horribly wrong. While I think some aspects of it are ridiculous (like the fact that it's become more of a ref CYA than anything), I also don't agree that a bunch of calls need to become reviewable. There are certain things that, yeah, it doesn't seem like it would be that much trouble to have it be reviewable in the war room. At the same time, the more things become reviewable, the more the on-ice officials become obsolete and since robots are my greatest fear, we certainly do not want to make on-ice officials obsolete. And by we, I mean me.

Holy shit, tell me that's not terrifying.

Do I realistically think that could happen? Well, no. My point is that there is always going to be some human error in the game and I'm okay with that. I used to get very frustrated and angry but it's pretty pointless. I'm a big believer that it's good for the soul for people to emotionally invest themselves in something where they have absolutely no control over the outcome. That is being a sports fan. That is being a hockey fan. If you knew that every penalty would be called and every single moment in every game would be run exactly to the letter of the NHL rulebook, would you watch? Would it be interesting? Would there be goons and enforcers? Would there be role players at all or would everything become very homogenized? I guess I'm just trying to defend the referees just a little bit before these videos make them look completely stupid.

So I thought about bad reffing and, obviously, there are tons of examples but these are just the first ones that came to mind and that I could easily find on the youtube.

Ahhhh, the old 'intent to blow' nonsense. Goalie has on black pants. The puck is black. The ref can't possibly be expected to tell the difference between them, right?

I don't know why I remember this as clearly as I do because I really don't care about the Oilers or the Stars. Regardless, it just reminds me how much I hate Fatty McGeough.

Okay, this one is a two parter and it just happened so it was obviously fresh in my memory. This first video shows Ian White scoring with 29 seconds left in the game and the reason that's great is because he had been unjustly penalized with a double minor a few minutes beforehand on a call that shouldn't have been anything. After White's goal, the vid explains.

So everything is great, right? No. The Canes score with like 2 seconds to go in the game and it's really lame so it goes to OT. The Leafs have already been screwed so what are the chances of it happening again? Ugh, intent to blow...

PS- The fact that the Leafs ended up losing this game and that the Canes are the worst team in the NHL makes this all sting just a little bit more.

And just the night before that one, this happened. I don't even have an explanation for this and it's one of the rare times that the NHL has later come forward and said it's maybe kinda sorta just a little bit possible that the call they made wasn't the correct one. Maybe. Possibly.

You can't make a list of badly missed calls without including this one.

So I purposely didn't include anything that was a hooking/holding/slashing type call because those are more debatable and there is a lot more room for judgment calls in that case. I wouldn't necessary call it a ref blunder to just pick out a random instance or video and play it out of context and say, "See there! He missed that!" Within the context of any given game, there are different rules. Sometimes you watch a game and it looks like it's from 1996 with all the clutching and grabbing. I mean, there's basically a different rulebook used during the playoffs versus what gets called in November. But this? Anytime of year. Any year. The weakest call ever. And I was there. I saw it in person. I'm still sore about this. WEAKEST. CALL. FOR. A. PENALTY. SHOT. EVER.

Really? Nick Lidstrom? REALLY? Dude, it's Nick. It's 30 seconds to go in the last regular season game. How shitty. Just... gross. Terrible. Any time Ken Daniels or Mickey Redmond says, "Well, you decide," it means it was a shitty call. Always. I think this call is the reason why I hate Dustin Byfuglien so much actually.

Clearly there are tons more you can think of so post 'em in the comments because I want to watch them too. And am I crazy for being so zen about terrible reffing? Should I be more upset?